WE WANT AN ARTICLE

WE WANT AN ARTICLE

By Dave MacFarland and Tom Sommers - April 1991

Todd Shaner
Sports Editor-Evening Phoenix

Dear Todd,

I bumped into Al Lewis at Cooperstown last week. He was telling me of his plans to write an article for the Sporting News on the 1991 Stables Hogs. It reminded me of how disappointed I have been with your lack of coverage of the Hogs. I am enclosing a copy of our 1991 contract and Encyclopedia in hopes that this will help you appreciate the Hogs legendary stature.

You would think a team of such notoriety could command a little more attention from the Fourth Estate of their local community. Here we are about to begin our twelfth year of "softball excellence" without one feature article from Northeast Chester County's finest newspaper. (I don't even consider that poor excuse for journalism Mercury a newspaper.) One could only wonder why a journalist of your caliber would repeatedly pass up an opportunity to write an article that could produce a Pulitzer and vault him to national prominence that the New York Times would be breaking down his door. The answer can only be that you are trying to protect Phoenixville's little gem of the softball community from the inevitable flood of Hollywood agents, and movie contracts (Bad News Hogs, Field of Hogs, Eight Hogs Out). I must tell you Todd that the Hogs are ready to bask in the glory that only your gifted pen could bring them. If the most comprehensive compellation of statistical minutia is not enough to stir your creative juices, I would invite you to study the exhaustive Hog video library which includes such great hits as the Championship Season (1985), The Hogs Open Celebrity Golf Tournament (1990), The Hogs Awards Banquet (1990), et. al.

Hell, a team whose average age is almost 40 can only have so many city series campaigns mired in mediocrity left in their arthritic old legs. Sooner or later their spouses are going to catch on that this poor excuse for exercise is really a guise for middle age male bonding debauchery.

Todd, how long can you deprive yourself of a Hogs encounter? Surely the thought of meeting a Pung, Eggs or the legendary Areno must pique your journalistic interests. Learn the secret of why every team member has the number 14 on their jersey. Embroil yourself in the Hog of the Decade controversy. Appreciate the team's subtle strategy for staying out of the "A" league.

Don't delay any longer. Come and enjoy the fantasy, the mystique and the lore that is the Hog Experience.

T. Sommers

Coach & General Manager

Stables Hogs